In this life we know two things for sure. Your time on earth is limited and you will pay taxes. In today's article we are going to focus on time, more specifically how you can optimize your time so if you want to get married you are not wasting energy on men who are NOT right for you.
So how are you going to do this?
Let's discuss your first date strategy. Some women are going on first dates, keeping conversation PC, and hoping to get out of there with a guy that is intrigued, but not really getting or giving much information. Well, if you are serious about optimizing your love life this is not going to cut it.
A great first date should be light and fun but at the same time start answering many if not most of your questions on whether your date could potentially be a life partner.
Now, I am sure most of you are reading this and thinking I am crazy, and quite frankly you may be right. But, the reason I am coming off crazy is because most people don't realize they can get the information they need from their 1st date in a light and still fun first date way.
Let me show you:
My 5 Needs
1. Takes bad situations in stride - Positive attitude
2. Healthy Lifestyle
3. Can handle social situations / Not need me by her side the whole time
4. Challenges me/Supports me - Be able to learn from each other
So how do I figure out if my date has these qualities: (Numbers Correspond to the Numbers Above)
1. Ask person about their job? Are they excited or say something positive about their work? It is okay to not like your job but it is nice to hear some redeeming qualities about an activity that takes up so much time in a person's life.
2. What are your favorite foods? If answer is something unhealthy, ask, is that a cheat meal or is that your go to daily? Also, say, "you have a great body, what do you do to stay in shape?"
3. This may come in date 5, date 8, or maybe even later. But eventually you will want to bring someone to an event or to meet friends/family. Does your date need to cling onto you or can he mingle on his own?
4. Talk about what you do for work. Are they excited to ask you questions and learn more about what you do?
5. Ask, "What do you do for fun? What do you and your friends do together?" If your date has a big social life, doing a lot of activities he will probably want to maintain them even after you combine lives.
Last week I was sitting down with a client to create her online dating profile and we got to the section that said, "What are you doing with your life?"
The answer was Managing Director of an entire division, managing over 500 people. She asked me, "is it okay to put that there?" I said, "100%, yes!"
"But won't I scare men away?" She quickly retorted.
I replied, "I hope so! The man that is right for you will be impressed by your success, and be excited to learn more about you. The guy that is wrong for you, will be intimidated and instead of building you up and pushing you forward will compare his career to yours and feel inadequate."
You can craft an online dating profile that is a total people pleaser and you will receive more messages than everyone else. Or you can create a profile that truly depicts who you are and what you need in a partner and then receive messages from men that want you and are solid contenders for a lifelong partner.
I would suggest the latter because who has time to go on 2000 dates with men that can't handle your success and don't want you for you?
Everyone wants to know, what are the chances of falling in love? How many dates do I need to go on? How many people do I need to meet?
Well today, I am going to give you the answer. One study says if you meet 1,000 strangers you would be fall in love with either 5 or 6 people. Since most of us just want to fall in love once, this would mean, if you met 200 strangers, one of them could be the love of your life.
I am not sure if 200 is a discouraging or encouraging number, but in my humble opinion, that's not bad.
Now, imagine instead of meeting strangers, you knew definitively what you needed in a partner. If you knew that and then attempted to go on dates with people that qualify, how many people would you need to meet to fall in love?