You’ve got his number, you want to text him, and you want to make this guy go crazy for you. We spend more time communicating via text messages, WhatsApp, Facebook, and Instagram messenger than ever, so what's the best way to build chemistry and attraction via text? Is there a certain approach you can take to spark his interest and drive him wild? What’s the best way to set yourself apart from everyone else?
In today’s article on how to text a guy, I want to give you some tips and tools that I share with my clients during our one on one coaching sessions. By incorporating these techniques into your conversations via text with this guy, you’re going to have everything you need to make him become addicted to you!
How to text a guy and spark his interest
I’ve been working with women who want to perfect their seduction and flirtation skills for many years now, so I can tell you what works and what doesn’t. For starters, one of the most common mistakes I see is a person trying to show their interest by constantly telling their “target” how attracted they are. The thing is, human nature makes us take things that are handed to us on a silver platter for granted. What’s more, we’ve been taught that to receive more love, we need to keep giving more love.
Human nature is a fascinating thing and works a bit differently, and we need to keep this in mind while we discuss how to text a guy you like…
First things first, it’s better to communicate your interest in person than through text message, especially if it’s early on in the dating process. I know that we’re in the 21st century and it feels like everything happens through text, but we need to build attraction in a way that truly grabs his attention! Because texting is so commonplace, I want you to stand out in his mind.
What to text a guy when you want to drive him wild:
It all begins with laying out a good foundation. The more you know about him, the easier it will be to attract him, so it all starts with asking him the right questions. Show him that you’re genuinely curious about his life, and you can start to talk about your personal life as well.
This is so important because men respond well when they find someone who is fun, uplifting, and interesting. They tend to pull away when they start to feel pressure to be in a relationship, to be a couple, to make rules, etc. This is why I always talk about building attraction by creating interest. So when you’re texting this guy, ask him about his life! I know that a lot of people struggle with this simply because they like the guy and it makes them a little self-conscious. It feels like there are stakes so they put pressure on themselves to be extra flirtatious or even eager.
There is a simple remedy for this: Just talk to this guy the way that you would talk to your best friend. Let your humor shine through, don’t be afraid to joke around, and don’t think about labels like “the relationship” or “boyfriend.” This way, you’ll allow it to develop easily and naturally. Whatever you do, don’t try to rush things. You’ll only put pressure on yourself and he’ll pick up on it! Just allow yourself to be yourself, and then we can get into honing in on sparking his interest…
How to text a guy you like: Tell him about YOU
We want to find out more about his life, but it’s equally important to talk about your personal life as well. There is a really effective tool for this, actually. If you can spark his curiosity, you’ll grab his attention.
Look at the difference between, “Today was nice because I ran into an old friend,” and “You’ll never guess what happened today!”
The way you text can create excitement and complicity. In the second option, he’d immediately want to know what happened and it’s easy for him to continue the conversation with you. Then you could go on to say that you bumped into this friend at the supermarket which is nuts, because you met them in a different city. Be playful in your storytelling and you’ll make the conversations fun and captivating. Men love to talk about themselves but they also like to hear stories, and this is the perfect way to share more about your life as well.
This way, he’ll become more and more interested, in your life, and not just your appearance! The more you share, the more you’ll build chemistry. I often see that when a woman likes a guy, she’ll want to get straight to the point and talk about feelings and relationships, but this can undermine you. If you do that, you’re moving too fast so I really encourage you to talk to this guy as if he were your best friend, and don’t be afraid to show him how interestING (not interested) you are! There is no need to play a role or to play games. It’s just going to help you be even more confident, which is something that men find irresistibly sexy.
What to text a guy: Flirtation and teasing
We can’t neglect the importance of flirtation when it comes to how to text a guy. We’re all here because we want to have fun and be happy. Nobody wants to talk about deeply serious stuff that might feel a little heavy when you’re first starting to build chemistry. So be fun, share pictures of your day and show him that you’re enjoying yourself! Live a life that looks interesting and inviting and remember, men LOVE to chase. They want you to be a challenge.
So this is where flirtation and teasing can come into play! Let’s say that you dance salsa. Let him know! Talk to him about how much you love it and how it makes you feel. Then tease him when you talk about going out dancing together one night.
“Oh, you think you could keep up with me on the dance floor? ;)”
So often we forget to show our personalities when we like someone, when that’s the key to making them fall for you! The more you can flirt and tease while showing him that you’re confident in what you bring to the table, the more you become a challenge. This is what will keep him coming back for more!
Don’t text a guy all the time!
As this article comes to a close, I want to leave you with one last bit of useful information, and this is huge. If a guy feels that you are constantly available to him, it’ll become easy for him to take you for granted.
We don’t want that at all, so be busy! Fill up your schedule with people, projects, and activities that bring you joy! Make the conversations you have with him fun and flirtatious, and don’t be afraid to take your time to respond to him. This way, you naturally make him realize that your life is rich and inviting. He might even realize that he’d be a fool to not want to try to be a part of it.
My friends, this is where social media comes into play. Even if you aren’t talking to him all the time, you can be posting pictures of all the fun things you’re doing, the workout you just completed, the trip you’re planning on taking and it will all catch his attention. He will subconsciously put you on a pedestal when he realizes that you’ve got so much interesting stuff going on AND you’re making him wait.
You’re the challenge, you’re the prize, and you’re in control of your life! Ladies, there is nothing sexier in a man’s eyes.
I wish you all the very best in love,
Your #1 French relationship coach
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