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A relationship, like most other things in life, happens in stages.
Each one builds on the last and they are a vital part of getting to the ultimate goal of most relationships: a lifetime together.
Understanding what stage you're in is important because it can help you determine whether or not you are moving forward and perhaps whether you even want to.
Listed below are the five stages that couples go through.
1. The Honeymoon Stage
Once you get past online matchmaking and the first few awkward dates, you enter the first stage of a relationship. Often referred to as the puppy love stage, this is the least real part of any relationship.
That’s because your infatuation with this newfound person blinds you to their flaws. This is not your fault, however. It’s just nature’s way of getting two people together in order to ensure they lay proper foundations that will be crucial later on.
In this stage you will talk every day and perhaps see one another just as often. You will ignore some things that you dislike in favor of ensuring that your partner can remain on a pedestal for as long as possible.
This period generally lasts a few months...
2. The Post-Honeymoon Stage
...And then, suddenly, your partner begins to lose their luster. Of course, you still like them (and perhaps even “love” them), but you start taking notice of their flaws and the things they do to get on your nerves.
It’s also during this stage that you begin to realize how much work it takes to maintain a relationship.
This stage results in a lot of breakups because in it people begin to consider whether the person they’re with actually meets their needs and desires. Often times, despite a strong emotional connection, people realize that the relationship might be dying.
3. The Steady Stage
If you’ve made it to the steady stage, congratulations! The post-honeymoon phase is one of the most difficult to conquer and once you do it, it means that you’re ready for true romance.
No longer are you driven by your lust, but rather by a deep love for your partner. Instead of formal dates, you are okay with hanging out with each other at home, watching TV or just eating casual meals together.
During this stage you will probably meet the parents and know all of your partner’s friends, all of whom probably find your little ‘couple-y’ idiosyncrasies extremely annoying!
4. The Comfortable Stage
The comfortable stage is both pleasant and dangerous.
It’s the stage where you can just be yourself without hiding any of your quirks or habits. If you wear makeup, you’re probably no longer compelled to do so in front of your partner. Everything just clicks as it should and you feel like it can last forever.
But therein lies the danger. At this point in a relationship, people become content. They often take their partner for granted and might even stop considering their needs and future plans. This usually isn’t done intentionally, it’s simply a result of relationship satisfaction.
This stage concludes with the final stage...
5. The Commitment Stage
After all of that time and effort, you’re finally in a relationship that works so well that you begin considering the future.
For some couples that future might involve marriage, for others, it’s just moving in together. No matter what it is, it’s a sign of full commitment to your partner.
This is the final stage of your relationship as two people dating and the beginning of something perhaps even more complex, but ultimately, much more rewarding, meaningful, and - dare I say it - beautiful.
I would like to end this article by reminding the reader that no relationship follows a perfect timeline and that having expectations or desires to move something that is still immature or unready move forward can be unhealthy.
That said, keep an eye out for the signs and you will find that your relationship has likely followed these predictable, yet important and meaningful stages.
From Your EZ Dating Coach - Mike Goldstein
These stages are spot on for the typical relationship. However, one very important thing to note is that if you get to any stage and feel like you didn't adequately experience one of the prior stages it is okay to take a step or two backwards. Your path doesn't need to be a straight line and based on a specific time frame. Every relationship is different and every person is different so no relationship formula will work for everyone. Thus feel free to make it to stage 4 and then head back to stage 2 or start talking about things in stage 5 but if you realize you need more time to work on the relationship head back to stage 4.
Anyway, happy dating folks, be good to your partner!
About the Author
Pauline Plott is a London-based blogger who became a dating guru after learning the psychology behind modern romance and signing up for every dating website in pursuit of relationship bliss. She shares her reviews and opinions on DatingSpot.co.uk.
"I don't want to be a nag." - Every Woman. "I don't want you to be a nag either." - Me
So every woman is terrified of being a nag. Rightfully so, because a woman that nags will send any man headed for the hills. But, a woman who sets boundaries can do it in a sexy way which will have men begging for more.Ready to learn how?
Watch this video:
So let's first understand why setting boundaries is going to enhance your relationships and then I will explain how to implement.
Men want women to make dating easier. What this means is men want women to give them a roadmap to their heart. If you tell him what you want, what you need, the guy that cares about you will do it. Now, many of you will say, "I don't want to tell him, I just want him to know." My response is "good luck." I am a professional dating expert and I can promise you I have no idea what my girlfriend wants on a random Tuesday. But, I love when she tells me, "I had a tough day today, will you give me a hug?"
This is the scariest part because your biggest fear is turning into the naggy woman. So let's talk about proper implementation and improper with some examples.
Improper - "You never call me. I feel so unimportant to you."
Correct - "You would make me the happiest woman in the world if you called me a few times a week. You are such a great guy, and I know you are busy at work but I would feel so special if you found a few minutes just to say "hi."
Let's go back to Why?
Why is setting boundaries so important. If you do not feel heard in the relationship eventually you are going to snap and either leave the guy, be unhappy in the relationship, or lash out by yelling at your guy who probably had no idea he was doing anything wrong.
On the flip side, men LOVE when women communicate what they need. Yes, the busy guy may initially not be so excited that he needs to stop work to give you a call a few times a week. But after some time he is going to crave it. He is going to look forward to the part of his day where he gets to take a break and catch up with his best friend and lover. However, you are never going to get this unless you ask for it and most importantly ask for it in the right way, coming from a place of happiness and how to become even happier, not a place of complaining and nagging.
So I will leave you with this. If men like when you set boundaries and obviously you would like to be true to yourself and speak your mind what are you waiting for? Stop sitting on the sidelines and build your perfect relationship! Remember, setting boundaries is sexy!
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We are dealing with an epidemic in today's world. The epidemic is effecting both men and women. The epidemic has positive aspects but also has some negative aspects. Let's talk about this epidemic. The epidemic is that women have entered the work force and they are kicking butt. This is great because, smart women helping companies, means more profit and better products. But this is bad because women are often asked to act like men while at work. This process can be exhausting. Women come home and they are tired and sometimes have a difficult time of transitioning back into their normal state of acting like a female.
So what happens when a woman acts like a man? The woman is fiercely independent, does everything herself, but lacks receiving support. When a woman doesn't receive support, she doesn't feel whole.
What happens to men when women are super independent. They no longer feel needed. Let's dive into this. Back in the day, men used to hunt, slay dragons, and other manly things that involved protecting their women. Now, men don't get to slay dragons and thus need to find new ways to protect. One hundred years ago, men were typically the only income provider and thus felt satisfaction in bringing home the bacon. However, now women are also working and they no longer get to feel needed in regards to providing financial security.
So what does all this mean?
1. Gender lines are being blurred at home and at work and both sexes are confused
2. Women are exhausted
3. Men don't feel as useful as they used to
How do we fix these problems?
Before we solve the problem. Let's define the three types of confident woman. Best described in this video:
Three Types of Confident Women:
1. I Can't Do Anything Woman - Lacks Confidence
2. I Can Do Everything Woman or Anything He Can Do, I Can Do Better - Remember the Mia Hamm vs. Michael Jordan commercials? This woman is super woman and literally can and will do everything. This could be the single mom, this could be the single woman with the big career, fancy car and house, and amazing family.
3. I Can Do Everything But I Ask For Help Too - This woman is enlightened, smart, and truly gets it. This woman realizes we have an epidemic. She realizes that when she does everything herself she will be exhausted. But, instead when she asks a man for help, she gets two birds with one stone. She gets her man to feel needed and she alleviates her own stress of having to do everything. She feels supported.
So back to how do we fix the epidemic?
Simple. Women need to get comfortable asking for help. They need to ask for help, not because they need it, but because men need it and quite frankly wouldn't it be awesome to have your guy help you with things?
Let's talk examples so you can start executing immediately.
Let's say you go grab a coffee with your guy but you forgot to get sugar. I can do everything woman would just go get herself. But, I ask for help too woman would say, "would you mind getting me two packs of sugar."
Guy feels needed and says, "sure."
He comes back and you say, "Thank you so much, you are so great at taking care of me."
GUY FEELS LIKE A MILLION BUCKS AND ACTUALLY SUCCESSFUL AT BEING A
BOYFRIEND. (Man's largest insecurity is always being a crappy boyfriend)
If you are consistently telling him he is doing a good job that is the equivalent of him telling you, "wow you look amazing in those jeans."
To recap, if you really want to take strength and confidence to the next level, it is not doing everything yourself. It is getting your man to do things for you even though you are more than capable of doing it yourself.