Has this ever happened to you? Your relationship seems to be going great and then BAM… your boyfriend disappears. You were probably left feeling hurt and confused and maybe even angry. You also might have blamed yourself. I am here to tell you that you are not to blame and you can and will get past these negative feelings.
This is the most important lesson that I can teach you: No one can make you feel anything. Yes, someone’s words or actions can bring on negative feelings but you have the power to turn it all around. Every day, you have to wake up and to decide how you feel. You have to tell yourself that yes, that person hurt you but if they are capable of doing that to you, you don’t want them in your life anyway. You have to move forward with positivity and invite positive people into your life.
I know all too well that this is easier said than done. The secret is that you have to fake it until you make it! How do you do that? When someone asks you how you’re doing, tell them that you are fantastic, amazing, or phenomenal! Even if I am feeling down or in a bad mood, if I use one of these happy adjectives and put on a happy face, I start feeling better. I bet you will, too! Give it a shot! It’s amazing what a positive outlook can do!
For the record, there are tons of reasons why a man might disappear and most of these reasons have nothing to do with their partner. Maybe he is not ready for a commitment… Maybe things just don’t feel right… Maybe he is panicking and can’t handle confrontation… Maybe he doesn’t think he’s good enough for you…Whatever his reasoning might be, if he chooses to vanish without coming to you and telling you what’s going on, he is not the one for you. He did not end the relationship in the right way but that relationship was meant to come to an end so you can find someone who would never disappear on you.
Keep in mind that there is a big difference between a man needing space and a man completely up and vanishing. Space is actually really healthy and helpful for men. When they are under stress, they need that time to decompress and clear their mind. If you see your man seeking out time alone, be supportive and let him know that you are there for him if he wants some company later.
When something brings you down, you can lift yourself up, even if you’re just pretending to be ok at first. Remember that there is always a reason why people do the things that they do. If he disappeared, that’s on him. Now, you are free to find someone who will stay by your side no matter what. Do your best to stay positive and it will get easier and easier.
The fake it until you make it method doesn’t work for everyone all the time. If you are feeling depressed, please know that you are not alone. I encourage you to reach out to loved ones and seek help from a professional.
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