Sometimes, communication between men and women can be tricky. There are a lot of common issues with texting in particular! EZ Dating Coach, Mike, experienced this first hand. He prefers to use texting solely for logistics and his girlfriend misunderstood his short texts as a lack of interest in her. A lot of other people struggle with these issues so Mike was super pumped to talk about texting with his favorite match maker, Rachel Russo. Her insights on texting are really eye opening! She gave some awesome tips to help combat common texting problems between men and women:
First, Rachel teaches us that men process and use less words on a daily basis than women do. If you text a man a long paragraph, it can overwhelm him. How can you make sure that you don't send a text that is just too much? You can shorten and edit your text messages to use as little words as possible. Texting men is all about quality vs. quantity! Your man might not want to have full conversations via text. He most likely prefers texts that are short and to the point.
Next, Rachel talked about the different type of energies that men and women possess. Women with more of a feminine energy like it when the man pursues and chases them and they like following his lead. In these cases, the man should be the one to text the women first. Women with more of a masculine energy are probably very proactive and don't care who texts who first. These types of women should go ahead and text him first! Men with a feminine energy like it when the women texts them first and men with a masculine energy who like the chase might be turned off if a woman texts him too much. So, ask yourself what type of energy you and your man have and go from there.
Rachel went on to tell us about the biggest mistakes that a women can make when texting men, specifically alpha males. In addition to texting a lengthy message, initiating more contact or more dates can also be a bit of a turnoff. You have to let him come to you and pursue you. Also, texting him all the time and sending a lot of photos and videos can make you look overeager. If your man is an alpha male, let him take the lead and keep your messages short and sweet.
Next, they discussed the topic of texting photos to a man. If a man asks you for photos and you aren't comfortable sending them but you are interested in him, write him something playful and light-hearted. If you are open to sending pictures in the future, let him know that so he doesn't feel rejected. Tell him that it has nothing to do with him and you might be open to doing that sometime in the future. If you aren't into, again, let him know that it has nothing to do with him but it just isn't your thing. Keep it playful but be true to yourself. You be the judge. If his photo requests are sending up a red flag for you, listen to your instincts and trust your gut. He might only be interested in a sexual relationship and if that isn't what you are looking for, it's probably best to move on.
Rachel had great insights on the best way to text an alpha male. Next, Mike wanted to know what the best way is to text a beta male is? Rachel said that women might need to take the lead with a beta male when it comes to texting. How can you do this? You can create a conversation that helps him to open up. You can do this by asking open-ended questions. Questions that warrant a simple yes or no answer might result in a short, choppy, and pretty much one-sided conversation. You have to prompt him to get responses from him. Follow up texts are also great! After you go on a date, text him the next day telling him what a wonderful time you had. If you make it obvious that you are interested in him and you would like to see him again, that will eliminate the fear of rejection and give him the courage to take the lead.
Rachel shared some interesting points on phone conversations. There are a lot of people out there, especially millennials, who don't like talking on the phone. If you enjoy talking on the phone and you want to see if your man likes it, simply ask him if he's a phone person when you are out together. Keep it light and don't let him feel cornered or pressured to talk on the phone. You can also suggest that you FaceTime or Skype with each other. Men are very visual creatures and he might be more open to that type of interaction. You can also call him and have short and fun conversations. This will show him that talking on the phone can be very nice. Lastly, you can let him know how much you enjoy talking to him and how even a short phone call to hear about his day and say good night would make you really happy. He is sure to be responsive to this because men love knowing that they made you happy.
Next, Mike asked Rachel about something that he personally struggles with: flirting via text messages! She told him that this is usually different for each couple. She suggested that you use what you know about your partner to flirt with them. What do they like? A little teasing and joking around can be fun and flirty, too. You can also try sending photos. Something cute or funny can go a long way, as well. Keep in mind that you only want to do this every now and then so it doesn't lose its charm.
Texting is quickly becoming people's go to form of communication. These awesome tips will help you to send your man texts that he loves.
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