My friend Krista texted me this week asking for some dating advice. Krista, recently went on a date with this guy. She thought nothing of it, they casually grabbed a drink on a Tuesday, no big deal. Wednesday night they got dinner, Friday they got drinks. Then Monday he took off work to take Krista hiking. All of a sudden they had hung out every day for a week. Needless to say Krista was really starting to like this guy.
However, the following Friday rolls around, the guy tells Krista "I am going home for the weekend to see my family" and all of a sudden after that text the fluid text conversation went into radio silence.
"He is normally so attentive via text and now he is not really responding," exclaimed Krista.
Krista begins to panic and wonders if the guy is still into him. She texts him telling him, "I am going to a family party that is only 20 minutes from you on Friday night". She did this thinking since she was close he would be able to sneak out to see her. However, she got little response. Krista begins to freak out and starts thinking whenever she likes someone they do not like her.
Now, her gut is telling her to text him or do something. She is dying to speak to him or know what is going on. However, it is time to get into the male psyche and learn what the best plan of action for Krista is.
First, it is vital to realize that most men can reach capacity with people or activities. In this case, he may have reached his capacity with Krista. Now, this doesn't mean he doesn't like Krista. He may be head over heels for Krista, and quite frankly, if he hung out with her every day for a week, he probably does like her a lot. However, when a man hits his capacity he needs to do something, anything else, to bring himself back to normal. Thus, if he goes away for a weekend, as long as Krista leaves him alone he will be able to get back to center. Once, he is back to center he will reach out to Krista if wants to see her.
Now ladies, this is very counter-intuitive. You would think if this guy likes Krista so much, why wouldn't he be calling and texting all the time? Great question! This is not how men work, men will give and give until they reach capacity, once they are at capacity, it doesn't matter how much they love you, at this moment they cannot give anymore. The man needs to recharge his batteries so he can go back to being the person he normally is.
Now, back to Krista. Fortunately, she has the easiest job in the world. Her best plan is to DO NOTHING. All she needs to do is wait, if the guy is interested in her, he will ask her out again. She needs to let the man do some hunting at this point. If he wants Krista he will make the move.
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