One of the major online dating sites has analyzed millions of data points and together we have come up with the following list of guidlines for building both your profile and selectiong your profile pictures.
No one in picture with you – especially opposite gender
Make the picture as close to a square as possible
Don’t be too far or too close to camera
Cleavage – Will Increase Messages (May want to experiment, may get the wrong messages)
Men – Don’t have shirt off
Varied Situations – Beach, Skiing, be in appropriate clothes
Use as many as photos as possible
Be Specific – EX: Travel: Not I enjoy travel. Say: I went to Paris, Barcelona, and the Philippines.
Don’t talk about previous relationships
White space - Make your profile easy on the eyes
If you are not a bullet point reader but only read paragraphs. Read This because this is the most important advice! Be specific in your online dating profile.
DO NOT SAY: I am honest, fun, love the outdoors, and blah blah blah.
Do Say: When I was 25 I found a briefcase with 300k in it, I brought it to Wells Fargo and recieved a thank you. Every Tuesday and Thursday I play outdoor soccer for an hour.
See the difference between specific story telling and generic adjectives that don't truly tell a person who you are?
Women, men, dating coaches, psychologists, and everyone tells me that men pick up women. Men approach women.
This has been true for a very long time. Today, I offer a secondary option. Strong, confident, successful, beautiful women, (that still make a man feel needed) will come introduce themselves to men they are interested in.
Here is an example dialogue at a grocery store:
Hot Successful Woman: "Excuse me, I think you are cute and wanted to come meet you."
Cute Man: "ummmm, Thank you! How flattering, I am George, what is your name?"
Dialogue continues, eventually phone numbers exchange and George follows up to ask her on a date.
Why do I feel so adamant that women "should be allowed to approach men"?
First off, 21st century, women should be doing whatever the hell they want! Why should a woman need to bat her eyelashes, stare for four seconds, for a guy to maybe muster up the courage to come approach her. It is time for woman to take their dating lives into their own hands.
Why must this happen? Because men, myself included see hundreds of women per day that we think are gorgeous, wife material that we will never approach because we are:
1. Focused on work
3. Focused on getting lunch
4. Inside our own head
5. Don't know how to approach women
Women, it is time to help the opposite sex out, and quite frankly help yourself out. If you approach a man, there is only two possible outcomes.
1. You flattered the guy (He feels like a million bucks)
2. You get a date
My rant continues: For Men!
Men, if you see a good looking woman! Go up to her and tell her. Everyday life is tough, and every girl whether she will admit it or not loves a sincere genuine compliment.
(Do not yell compliments while women walk by)
DO: Intimately say excuse me, and then offer whatever the first thing that came into your brain about the woman's physical appearance.
Now go out into the world, put smiles on strangers faces and GET SOME DATES with people you are immediately attracted to!
June 4th, 2014 - Written by Alli Burg, Marketing Confidence Coach
Relationships are awesome but being single is an absolute blast. You and I, are single by choice. We are considering the right guy that deserves our un-divided attention and until then, we are having a great time free flying.
Dating should be fun, and if you aren’t enjoying yourself, it’s your fault.
I will never claim to be a dating expert, but I truly enjoy myself when it comes to dating and I would like to share my tools with you in hopes that it helps you find more fulfillment and happiness when you are single. Try re-framing dating differently, have a belief that you will find interesting people to get to know. When you start feeling lonely or frustrated that he hasn't shown up yet consider the following tools to help re-focus yourself:
The simple answer: Confidence. Confidence really is important. Life is about perception, how you view the world is what you get from it. If you don't view yourself as awesome, how do you expect someone else to? Take some of your alone time to learn a new skill or take that salsa class that you have always wanted to do. It will give you an instant boost of confidence doing things you love. It will also make for some good conversations with new people.
The thrill of not knowing. I don't know about you, but when I wake up in the morning I typically enjoy the thrill of not knowing what’s in store for me, or who I will meet that day. Believe that you will meet good friendly people throughout your day; it makes you open up and smile more. Happy people attract happy people.
Facing yourself. The best part for me about being single, is the solo one-on-one time to really assess, confront, and embrace aspects of my life that may or may not be working. You only consider yourself in these instances, which can help uncover true and helpful insights. Selfies welcome.
Be sexy, but only for yourself. I like to treat myself well when I’m living the single life. Bachelorette silk robe a must. I also totally don't shave sometimes for a week(s).
Out and about with whatever your heart desires. Being able to do whatever you want on a beautiful Saturday afternoon is so fantastic. So where will it be? Yoga class, brunch with the ladies, Bushwick Open Studios, Pier 13, bike ride upstate, cobble stones? Bring your camera to document all the cool shit you do.
Girlfriends. This is a very special one. When you are single, you rely on your friends for social activities. Some of the most ultimate girl bonding is done between two single friends to be each other’s wing-woman and have each other’s back through thick and thin. Cherish your amazing girlfriends. Send them handwritten cards on holidays.
Cheers to a adventure!